I would like to share examples of God’s faithfulness and provision to women throughout Holy Scripture before sharing my own testimony. Sarah, Rebekah, Rachel, Hannah, and Elizabeth are some women in The Bible who were considered barren. In ancient times, barrenness was often seen as a punishment from God for disobedience, but he had other plans for them. God used one other woman’s story of motherhood to change everything….the Virgin Mary. See Scriptures in the images below:

God showed up for these women and their families which impacted generations upon generations. With the exception of Mary, the mother of Jesus, these women had lost all hope for them to grow their family, but God knew his plan and was faithful in providing the gift of children. Mary is THE one and only unique example of God using the Holy Spirit to conceive a child, the Son of God and Son of Man, who in turn became the Savior of the world. God is the ultimate miracle worker! God blessed each of them and in turn, blessed so many others, including me. Now that you have a better understanding about the hope I was able to hold onto through the Living Word when it came to God’s plan for my family, it is time for my story:

I’ve wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember except when I was letting fear get in the way of my true desire. I had talked myself out of wanting children at around 26 years old.  I have a genetic condition that impacted my vision and so many other areas of my life. Add on mental and physical health issues that could be passed on to my child. Then, looking at the world around me it felt cruel to bring an innocent child into this mess. That was the year I got married also! My husband and I spoke at great lengths how each of us felt about having children. He was understanding of my concerns, but I was to stay open minded. I have a feeling looking back that he knew that I was letting fears take over but didn’t want to push it. 

Rewind to when I was 21 and still in college. I had experienced irregular cycles for months. I was diagnosed with Polycystic Ovary Syndrome (PCOS) and before I knew it, I felt like my whole world was falling apart. One of the symptoms of PCOS is possible infertility. I went into a deep depression for 8 months after diagnosis and had to withdraw from college to seek treatment. I eventually got back on my feet, returned to school, and after only an additional year I graduated with my bachelor’s degree. Upon moving home, I was put on birth control to even out my hormones and regulate my cycles. I was 23 at this time. I started having issues with my blood pressure because of the increased hormones, so that was yet another diagnosis to monitor. Fast forward to marrying my husband, I became more open to the idea of having children because my faith began growing tremendously. God knew exactly who and what I needed to draw near to him once again. Not long into the marriage I was diagnosed with pre-diabetes and was put on Metformin to regulate my sugar levels. I found out this medication can make you more fertile, which got me thinking more about my feelings toward the likelihood of becoming a mother. I was still taking birth control for a while after this. 

One day in July 2023, I listened to a podcast about detoxifying your life. One thing that was mentioned that hit home was avoiding birth control due to not only its side effects but also because it is preventing life from being created. I felt the Holy Spirit nudge me to help me understand that I needed to stop taking this medication that  1.) was no longer even working to regulate me but more importantly  2.) had me playing God and trying to control when or if I have children when I believed we were “ready.“ 

After talking to my husband about the decision, I stopped taking the birth control without even thinking to call my doctors until after the fact. I eventually called my OBGYN asking if I needed to worry about any side effects from my other medications I was still taking that could impact a fetus if I were to get pregnant. She told the nurse to relay this message, “the only thing you have to worry about is if you were to actually want to get pregnant it would be difficult to do so.” That was slightly discouraging but I had come to terms with the fact that if God wanted to give us children, only he would make it happen. My husband and I put the possibility of children in God’s hands and oh how he delivered! 

Around September of 2023, I felt the urgent need to step down from youth ministry that I had been involved in for over a year, in order to rest. God had been instructing me to rest for over a year but this time it felt necessary. It was a difficult decision but I knew deep down it was for the best. My husband and I both felt the call to rest become stronger as time went on and agreed that God was guiding us to rest for a reason.

Another challenge I had been facing was experiencing vertigo leading to dizzy spells at random along with migraines and tinnitus and fullness in my ears.  I went to an ENT who wanted to prescribe me a diuretic to reduce fluid in my body. My OBGYN at the time had previously stated that this particular form of medication could cause harm to a fetus if I were to get pregnant, so being off of birth control, I wasn’t going to risk it. My primary care doctor tried to push me to get back on birth control so I could take the medication and get some relief from the vertigo. I initially reconsidered it but ultimately decided against it. That was God’s protection because about 2 months later (May 2024)…

I was late. Since my body had become regulated immediately after stopping the birth control, I decided to take a pregnancy test. I didn’t tell my husband I was planning on taking it because I didn’t want him to get his hopes up. I took 3 tests that next morning, all showing up positive. I couldn’t believe it, so I went to the doctor that afternoon to which the result was the same… I was pregnant! To say I was in shock was an understatement! I immediately began planning to share this news with my husband that night. I bought a book that we could read to our future child called “When God Made You.” I also bought a Father’s Day card that I wrote the news inside and placed it in the back of the book. I handed him the book with the card in a gift bag. He read the book thinking it was a message for him. Then he opened the card. He had joked earlier that I was going to tell him I was pregnant. I thought I hadn’t hidden the news well but soon realized he was clueless by the look on his face. It went from a look of doubt to a look showing complete shock to a hopeful look of joy. With each look came the question  “For real?” With different tones behind them each time. I filmed his reaction up until tears started flowing as I went to comfort him and celebrate God’s goodness! It was a BEAUTIFUL moment filled with awe and excitement that I won’t ever forget! Later, he shared with me that he wasn’t sure God would ever bless him with children because of his past. This allowed me to share the reminder that God doesn’t hold our past against us and longs to bless us due to his forgiveness and infinite love for us. 

My health was so good throughout my pregnancy. By this point, I had already been able to lose the pre-diabetes diagnosis but still had high blood pressure. Some medications were adjusted early on but after that my health issues were controlled. I kept saying that I wasn’t used to hearing, “Everything looks good for you and Baby. Everything is progressing normally.”

Toward the end of my pregnancy, they began monitoring my blood pressure and the baby’s heart rate more closely to which everything looked “good” each time. My OB was nervous to push my delivery to the 40 week mark with me having the diagnosis of high blood pressure prior to pregnancy. Because of everything being controlled, I really wanted to avoid induction and allow my son to come naturally. We ended up scheduling an induction for 3 days post due date with the hopes he would come on his own, but unfortunately that did not happen.

I went into the hospital at 4am on January 24, 2025, was induced at 8am, had my water broken at some point and after about 14 hours of labor finally decided I would get an epidural after all. Less than 30 minutes later, before the medication could take effect, it was time to push. I had found out that my son was in distress when there were signs that he passed his stool (meconium) before birth. I was able to push three times and he practically flew out into the world. I found out hours later that he had his umbilical cord wrapped around his neck three times and once around his arm. I also was informed at that time that he had inhaled the meconium and had to be resuscitated. I had no idea anything was wrong. I found out later, that I had some complications of my own while giving birth that ended up not being severe. As far as I am concerned, the doctor and nurses acting fast also saved my life that day. My strong and brave husband witnessed it all, from my doctor getting the umbilical cord removed to the pediatrician saving our newborn’s life, on top of them treating me, without panicking on the outside. I am so grateful to God for the medical team and for allowing my husband to remain calm while going to war in prayer for both mine and our son’s lives! So after 14.5 hours of labor, 3 pushes, and life saving interventions, our miracle baby was in my arms and doing well!

I felt the presence of the Holy Spirit in the room the ENTIRE time! I knew I had so many incredible prayer warriors interceding for us. I just put all my trust in God, listened to my 14 hour worship playlist (that I had really hoped was long enough), and prayed Scriptures the whole way through. I even had a nurse come in during one of my breaks from contractions and asked in disbelief, “is she smiling?” And the answer was “yes.” My husband was so supportive and loving through it all and has been an amazing father to our son! I’m more than thrilled that we have the opportunity to raise our precious boy together praying for him to one day have his own relationship with Jesus! 

Becoming a mother is all the cliches especially:

“You experience a whole new level of love when you have your own child.”

I’ve burst into tears so many times already just overwhelmed with gratitude to God for trusting me with this treasure of a child! 

Key takeaways from this testimony: 

1. God is so GOOD! 
2. Trust God with your story! 
3. Seek him for strength, courage, and wisdom! 
4.  Believe and know that God’s timing and plan are PERFECT! 

Below are Scriptures that encouraged me throughout this journey to motherhood:

“From my mother’s womb
You have chosen me
Love has called my name
I’ve been born again into a family
Your blood flows through my veins””

When I first found out I was pregnant through most of my first trimester, I actually was struggling to feel excitement because I couldn’t let go of the thought that it was all too good to be true that I was going to become a mother. I have a bad habit of waiting on the next shoe to drop rather than embracing the good that comes along in my life. I am so grateful to my husband for staying cool, calm and collected, trusting God every step of the way. We had an army of prayer warriors from the very beginning praying over our child and my pregnancy journey. This song actually was originally written by a “miracle child” (See Ken Helser Testimony). So, there was more than one reason that I listened to it for comfort especially those first weeks of pregnancy to remind me I have no reason to be afraid.

“Pray on through, this crazy life
And watch ’em fly straight to
The target that we’re aiming for, it’s you
The target that we’re aiming for is you

To the ends of the earth they will take this light
Like a torch that’s flying through the darkest night
Lift ’em up, pull back the bow
Say a prayer and let ’em go like arrows
Send ’em out like arrows”

I really enjoyed the movie this song was written for long before I was ever pregnant. This song hits the heart of our call as Christian parents to raise our children up with the aim of being more and more like Jesus each and everyday.

The verses above from Psalms and James were something we reminded ourselves throughout the pregnancy, that having a child is a gift, blessing, and joy from the Lord!

This has become an anthem of sorts for a while now! When I was nervous about being a mother, I gave it to God. He knew my heart yearned for a child of my own, and he reminded me that he will equip me, that I can trust him because he is forever faithful!

This song is based on Numbers 6:24-26. I had this sung over my husband and me at our wedding. I remember thinking then that I truly didn’t know if I would ever become a mother or if I even wanted to become one at that time. Praising God that the blessing sang over us for God  to have favor over our family and for our children actually became reality. 

“Your Nature” by The Belonging Co featuring Kari Jobe. is another song that hits differently now, The lyrics that have the most impact on my heart are below:

I used to listen to this song thinking about how I wasn’t sure if I was truly barren or not, but now I know that God had my promised land planned out long ago. Just as he promised to bring the Israelites out of Egypt and through the wilderness, he brought my husband and I through a season of uncertainty of whether we would experience parenthood naturally. If God can create, from the very beginning, the love story of Jesus being born of the Virgin Mary to save the whole world from our sinful selves, why oh why did I doubt that he wouldn’t have me bare my own child when it was a deep longing of mine? I’m so thankful God doesn’t hold our doubts against us to the point that we won’t receive the blessings he has in store for our lives. He’s patient, kind, good, and loving! What a Good, Good Father we have! 

Enjoy some pictures from the journey!